Jordan Peterson's book Beyond Order, 12 More Rules for Life has become, for some, almost a religious text, with the ‘rules’ serving as the 10 Commandments of modern life.
Are these the guiding principles by which we now structure our existence? It certainly is for some, and that’s worth thinking about.
12 Rules for Life frames a set of life principles to live by. Learn why you should stop telling lies to others, why you should stop doing things you know are bad for you, and how to pursue what is truly meaningful for you.
The book is beautifully written; Jordan Peterson's style is an understatement. You need to make time to read it. Most non-fiction/self-help books are written for the fast-paced reader. This author has taken the time to turn a non-fiction book into a work of art.
Jordan is a Canadian clinical psychologist and a professor of psychology at the University of Toronto.
So how did it all come to be? Well, he originally wrote this answer on Quora, which gained so much popularity that he turned it into a book. The book contains references to ancient greek mythology, psychology and art history but goes deeper and broader than these 12 rules.
It’s an epic read and journey. So we have compiled our key takeaways here. Perhaps they might spark your interest to venture into reading it for yourself.
1 Stand up straight with your shoulders back
This rule is not just about posture. It is about confidence. The world has winners and losers, and the winners have good posture because they have self-confidence, which leads to more wins.
So stand up straight, believe you can, know you are one of the winners and act like it.
2 Treat yourself like someone you are responsible for helping.
Treat yourself with the same kindness and responsibility as you would your children. You are the most important person you need to take care of. Stop waiting for others to take care of you.
Our lives are all intertwined, so your mistreatment of yourself can have catastrophic consequences for others. So strengthen the individual; start with yourself.
3 Make friends with people who want the best for you
There is a lot of negativity in the world. Learn the difference and recognise character when you see it. Embody that positive character. Be mindful of those that will pull you down or those using you. Make friends with those with enough character to want the best for you.
4 Compare yourself to who you were yesterday, not to who someone else is today
Pay attention, and focus on your surroundings. Find something that bothers you and fix it. Start with small habits. You will be less concerned about the actions of others because you are focused on yourself and improving yourself.
5 Do not let your children do anything that makes you dislike them
Don’t make excuses for your children’s bad behaviour. Correct it. Remember that parents are proxies for the real world. It is the parent’s responsibility to teach children how to function in society. If you find a particular behaviour difficult, just think about how the world will react. A well-adjusted child grows up to be a likeable adult that can positively contribute to society.
6 Set your house in perfect order before you criticise the world
People get caught up in how awful the world is and blame capitalism and the broken system. Before blaming, ask yourself if you genuinely have your own life in order. Start small — are you indulging in any self-deprecating habits? Fix that. Are your relationships in order? Stop making your life unnecessarily difficult. Take a good look at your life, improve it, and your outlook towards everything else will improve.
7 Pursue what is meaningful, not what is expedient
Expedience is following blind impulses, short-term gains, lying to get your way, and thinking that is narrow and selfish. It is immature, irresponsible, cowardly, and shallow.
Expedience only satisfies the self and now. Pursuing meaning is when making the world better, is at the top of your value hierarchy, not the self.
It is better to have meaning in your life than to have what you want. Because do we know what we want?
8 Tell the truth. Or at least don’t lie.
Lies start small and compound. Tell the truth. Try telling the truth if you feel weak, rejected, or confused. In paradise, everyone speaks the truth.
9 Assume the person you are listening to knows something you don’t
So many of us don’t listen to understand. We listen to respond. Because at some level, perhaps we feel we might know something the other person doesn’t. Socrates was known as the wisest living man because he knew that what he knew was nothing. Find humility in yourself and listen — to everyone — to learn.
10 Be precise in your speech
Be careful what you tell yourself and others about what you have done, what you are doing, and where you are going. Search for accurate and precise words. Simplify things by giving them precision. Use honest & particular speech — What am I afraid of — exactly? What do I want — exactly? What is wrong — exactly? Know and state where you are — precisely — so you know where you are going.
11 Do not bother children while they are skateboarding
The complex psyche of humans — when things are too safe, we try to test the limits and make things dangerous. So many mothers try to make their children ‘soft’ and shield them from danger and harshness. This results in ‘weak’ children. If you think tough adults are dangerous, wait till you see what weak ones are capable of.
12 Pet a cat when you encounter one on the street
With all the sorrow and anxiety in the world, don’t forget to stop and enjoy the small moments and genuinely enjoy the things that make you smile.
And don’t forget It starts with lobsters. So you have to understand about the lobsters.
If you want to purchase the book, you can buy it via Amazon here. If you’re short on time and want to read or listen to the key insights from the book, you can get them via Blinkist here.
You'll find it here if you would like to explore Episode 128: Jordan Peterson's 12 Rules For Life.
