Step out of Your Comfort Zone and Cultivate a Deep Sense of Self-awareness
EPISODE 223
"The Untethered Soul" by Michael A. Singer is a self-help book exploring personal transformation and achieving optimal performance. It delves into the importance of self-awareness and mindfulness in enhancing one's personal and professional life.
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The book emphasizes that our thoughts, emotions, or external circumstances do not define us. Singer encourages readers to detach themselves from their inner voice, which often creates limitations and holds them back from reaching their full potential. By objectively observing their thoughts and emotions, individuals can better understand themselves and their behavior patterns.
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Singer introduces the concept of the "witness," an inner observer or consciousness that can observe thoughts and emotions without getting entangled in them. Individuals can develop a sense of inner freedom and detachment from their inner dramas by cultivating this witness consciousness. This freedom allows them to make conscious choices and respond to situations with clarity and wisdom.
Through various practical exercises and techniques, Singer guides readers toward inner peace and liberation from the limitations of the ego. He teaches the importance of letting go of past traumas, fears, and attachments that hinder personal growth and performance. By embracing the present moment and surrendering to the flow of life, individuals can tap into their innate creativity, intuition, and resilience.
"The Untethered Soul" offers valuable insights and practices for personal performance by encouraging individuals to step out of their comfort zones, embrace uncertainty, and cultivate a deep sense of self-awareness. By implementing the book's teachings, individuals can break free from self-imposed limitations, unlock their true potential, and experience greater fulfillment and success in various aspects of life.
Buy the book from Amazon https://geni.us/Untethered_Soul
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RUNSHEET
INTRO
Oprah and Michael talk about Oprah’s favourite chapter
Remove Your Inner Thorn (3m42)
MINDSET: LEARN TO MOVE ON
Michael helps us understand - and therefore forgive ourselves - when we struggle
Surrender (2m30)
HABITS: WHAT WE CAN DO
Clark Kegley discusses the default way that people live their lives, and the strive for survival
Path 1 and FEAR (3m15)
Clark Kegley helps us continue towards getting the roommate on your side
Path 2 and 2.0 YOU (2m58)
OUTRO
Michael A. Singer shows us how to flow with our challenging moments, learn from them, and then let them go
Let it pass (3m37)
Buy the book from Amazon https://geni.us/Untethered_Soul
Get the summary from Blinkist https://blinkist.o6eiov.net/jr1nMP
Transcript
Mike Parsons: [00:00:00] Hello and welcome to the Moonshots Podcast. It's episode 223. I'm your co-host by Parsons, and as always, the man himself. He's back, Mr. Mark Pearson Freeland. Good morning, mark. Hey,
Mark Pearson Freeland: good morning, Mike. Good morning subscribers and listeners. Boy, do we have an action packed show that's not only introducing a brand new individual and book and framework of thinking, but also Mike kicking off a brand new series for us.
Mike Parsons: I love starting a brand new series. I'm always like, what am I gonna learn this series? What can I, what habits can I start? Um, maybe what habits I can stop? And I think that is very appropriate for the first show in this, uh, good
Mark Pearson Freeland: thinking series, mark. That's right Mike. We are kicking off a brand new series on good thinking based on the [00:01:00] success as well as the, uh, interesting ideas that we found on a few of the shows previously with regards to either physical, uh, approaches to, uh, mental wellbeing, but also different practices we can imagine in our minds.
But Mike, today we're kicking off with an absolute absolutely action packed. Book from Michael, a singer, the Untethered Soul of the Journey Beyond Yourself. And Mike. This is a pretty popular bestselling book from Michael, a singer. He's not only released the untethered soul, but he's also gone on to write a handful of others following that.
So maybe. Between you and me, there's an opportunity for us to come back to Michael Lasing in the future. But today, listeners we're digging into the untethered soul, which could be arguably his most, uh, well-known book because he's appeared on a number of different individuals promoting it.
Mike Parsons: Mike, I would say we need to imagine that David Goggins and Brene Brown met [00:02:00] in a bar.
They had a A child. And Michael Singer is the product because he really does have this amazing collection of work, which is really about to transform how we think, how we feel about things, and how we respond to them. And these are massive moonshots themes. We might not be in control of everything in the world, but we're certainly in control of how we choose to respond to them.
And we have so much to dig into. So if you are interested. In not letting your emotions get the better of you understanding a more even balanced path. Or frankly, you just like don't want to go to 10 straight away when things don't quite work your way. This is the show for you. Some might say it's a bit of a thorny issue, but I believe that's a great place to start, don't you, mate?
Yeah,
Mark Pearson Freeland: I think Mike, we should pull out any of the discomforts that we might have by digging in straightaway into [00:03:00] Michael, a singer's book, the Untethered Soul with Achi, uh, a very, a substantial and clear insight all around removing your inner thorn.
Oprah: My other favorite chapter of my new favorite book, uh, the Untethered Soul, is Removing Your Inner Thorn.
We all have them. Right? Yes, we do. Do you still have some thorns too? Of course you do. Okay. The spiritual journey is about constant transformation. So you were saying imagine, can you just do this for our audience? That whole pa passage on imagining you have a thorn, uh, in your arm that directly touches a nerve.
Can you do that? So,
Michael A Singer: the analogy we're using is if you had a thorn that was. It's touching directly to a nerve. So much so that anything that touched it caused pain inside of you. So if you walk to, to walk through the woods and the leaf touched it, you weren't able to walk. If you were, uh, trying to interact with people, it cause of disturbance.
And the key point of it is you have two choices. One is you [00:04:00] can either try to avoid everything in your life that touches that thorn, right? Or you can do this amazing alternative, which is. Take it out. All right. If you try to avoid it, you'll be avoiding it for your entire life. It will go
Oprah: on, which is what we're all doing, right?
Yes it is. We're all doing, we're trying. We, we got our thorns in and we don't want anybody to touch 'em. Yes. And if they touch 'em and they irritate our little thorn, we're upset. Cuz you shouldn't have touched my thorn. Yes. That's the hole,
Michael A Singer: and that's the game that we play is how do I build a life that avoids touching all this stuff that happened to me that I can't handle when they happen?
I couldn't handle it, and now it's caused all these soft spots inside of me. Thorns. Thorns. So I need to create a life. Train everybody around me, right? So they don't ever touch that. Avoid my thorn.
Oprah: Don't touch. Some people even say that, don't you go there with me. That's right. That's right.
Michael A Singer: Yeah, exactly Right, right.
The alternative is to understand you can remove that thorn inside of you the same as you can remove it outside, and if you remove it, you'll never have to think about it again. And you can start to enjoy your entire life. And that is
Oprah: spirituality, how? That is [00:05:00] spirituality. Now, how do you. How do you know what your thorn is?
Michael A Singer: Disturbance tells you. Just like pain happens when you hit the thorn outside. Yes. Disturbance happens
Oprah: inside because it's never what is actually happening. Right. It's what is happening is irritating your thorn. It was put
Michael A Singer: in there before. That's, that's very good.
Oprah: That's good. That's good.
Michael A Singer: So those events will show
Oprah: you.
That's good. Y'all get that? That's really good. So, Even when you see your husband leaves the, you know, drawers open or the whatever, open or left. Yes. Yes. It's not about what's going on, right? It's about the thorn. Yes. That was there. Yes. So, okay. How do we then begin to remove the thorns? That's the spiritual journey, is it
Michael A Singer: not?
Yes, it is. When something hits it, you will feel a disturbance pop up inside of you. Right, and you have to choose right? Then what are you gonna do about that?
Oprah: Okay. So, and, and by something hitting it mean, meaning you're in a conversation, you're in your office, somebody says something, it hits a nerve. [00:06:00] You think they have disrespected you.
Yes, whatever. They have stepped out of bound. They shouldn't have said that your boss did something. Your child is a, that's the nerve. But what's the difference between that? And they really did do something.
Michael A Singer: The difference is you always start. With saying, do I want to be disturbed? Do I like being disturbed?
No, I don't like being disturbed, so I have a choice. An event happened outside. I couldn't deal with that event without being disturbed. In fact, I promised you I didn't deal with it better without being disturbed. Disturbance isn't helping you. Disturbance is hurting you. Got it. And so you are way better off learning how to deal with the disturbance and that is also how you remove the tho they are directly related.
The fact that the situation outside stimulated this disturbance inside of you means that you've uncovered something stored inside of you that needs to come out.
Mike Parsons: That's interesting. I think, mark, the argument that singers making there is [00:07:00] something might trigger us to get frustrated, angry, anxious, stressed, or upset.
But what he's saying, there's, there's something behind that. You know, Oprah was riffing about not closing the sock straw. You gotta love Oprah. She's like this mega successful billionaire entrepreneur, and she can still complain about the being. But what I think the learning for us in this is, and I'm sort of unpacking this in real time, is like we can get all caught up by surface level things, but what singer's asking us to do is go a level deeper and say, well, why did that bother you so much?
And what's the real thorn that's annoying you and causing you that, uh, upset because he, he says, until you get to that, you're not really dealing. With the fundamental thing that's causing the emotional response. Pretty powerful, right?
Mark Pearson Freeland: Yeah, I, I, I think you're right. And I think the way I can try and build on that is, How he has [00:08:00] illustrated this idea is, is quite a new one to me.
I think he's calling out the fact that it's very, very easy for us all to avoid dealing with the thing that causes a lot of pain. Hmm. In this case, he's obviously calling, uh, calling out a thorn in our side and he's calling out specifically that it would, wouldn't it just be simpler in the long run? To deal with that thought, to take it out, maybe de maybe stitch it up, maybe put it to one side, move on and so on, rather than just putting a bandage on it every single time or maybe trying to ignore it.
For me, it's really a, a story that. Can break down a short-term reaction to something Yes. Behavior of ours perhaps that we've, uh, always had, certainly something that I would do if there's something that is causing great discomfort. Yeah, I I might try and deal with it later because at the, at the same as we all know, there's never a good time to deal with problems, is that, isn't
Mike Parsons: that true though?
But Mike, just let's capture that for a moment. How many [00:09:00] times. Do we find ourselves going, oh, that really frustrates me. Mm-hmm. But we, we, we don't deal with it. Why do you think we avoid, do you think it just, we sense that it might be uncomfortable, challenging, might be a bit upsetting to really get after it?
Do you think that's what it is? Uh, yeah.
I
Mark Pearson Freeland: think, I think there's, there's two ways. Or two reactions that I think come to mind. One is, uh, I, I don't really have time for this right now, so I'll deprioritize it. Mm. Maybe it's, there's a very important project or a very in, uh, important situation that's happening and you don't really wanna have to deal with it because there's something else that you've gotta deal with it first.
Mike Parsons: And also, mark, you and I both know, you're also, when you say there's not enough time, you're also choosing not to make time.
Mark Pearson Freeland: Right. It's that deprioritization, isn't it? Yeah. Which then builds onto the second one, which is the avoidance angle. Oh, I want to avoid dealing with this problem because I fear it.
Yes. I'm [00:10:00] scared of having to confront. Yes. The situation head on. What happens if I pull the needle out and it hurts even more? Right? Or what happens if uh, I pull it out and suddenly things get worse, so I'm gonna deprioritize it and leave it alone? When really, and as singers calling out, that's just a way of delaying perhaps the inevitable, or if not delaying it, you are leaving it to cause even more pain in the
Mike Parsons: long run.
Yeah, and I, I think about it a bit like physical discomfort. Like if I've got a sore back, you know, my first response is, That hurts. But it's all about being able to grab the roller or the yoga mat and stretch it out and, and deal with it because like chronic physical pain really takes its toll, as does emotional pain.
And, um, What's so great is we are about to dive into a book and a piece of work and thinking, uh, from Michael, a [00:11:00] singer that is all about getting into this and tackling this. And on the other side of that, I think there's all sorts of, I think your day can just be better. So I'm really excited to jump into all of that.
What I'm also excited to do, mark, is to bring to your attention and to all our listeners and members that we have. A couple of our members have, uh, had their annual, their their one year anniversary with us. We have new members as well. Um, so Mark, I think it is only appropriate that you cue the brass band, the trumpets, the horns, and that we usher in, um, our, and acknowledge our members and listeners.
Mark Pearson Freeland: Please welcome all of our untethered souls who are here with us, learning out loud each and every week, and joining us on the Moonshot's journey. Bob Johnny, John Terry, Ken Dimar, Marj, and Connor, Rodrigo, Lisa, Sid, Mr. Boner and [00:12:00] Paul Berg, Kaman. David, Joe Crystal, Ivo, Christian, Sam, Barbara, and Andre, all of whom have been with us for well over a year.
Mike, as as extra special. For all of those individuals, but also hot on those heels are Eric, Chris, Deborah, lase, Steve Craig, Daniel, and Andre, Ravi, Yvette, Karen Rowl, pj Nico, Ola, Ingram, Dirk and Emily, Harry, Karthik, Vanatta, Marco, Roger, Steph Gaia, Anna Raw Nilan, Eric and Diana Wade, Amanda. Christoph, Denise Tereza Bok, and our brand new members, Smitty and Laura, welcome to the Moonshots Rocket where we're all learning out loud together every single week.
Mike Parsons: Thank you so much for your contribution and your membership. Um, Much appreciated here at the Moonshots headquarters at the, uh, launchpad for moonshots. And I think it's only appropriate that we kind of launch in [00:13:00] now to the answer to this question that we were talking about, which is if you sense. That there is some emotional disquiet if you've got an inner tho.
The real thing that Michael, a singer does is he presents a solution to that, and I think it's only appropriate now that we jump into this idea of surrender without
Michael A Singer: specifically defining the word, is. I'm sure by now you understand what's meant by surrender. It doesn't mean you're surrendering to somebody.
It's not somebody else's will superimposed on top of yours. It doesn't mean you're a weakling. I surrender. I give up. I don't want to fight. It doesn't mean you're surrendering your marriage or marrying it doesn't mean you're surrendering your job or working. It doesn't mean anything like that. That's why I refuse to define surrender in the beginning.
Surrender is very, very subtle and very, very powerful, and you will find out that it [00:14:00] is the entire spiritual journey. What surrender is, as we've discussed it, is you are under predicament. It's called reality right now where almost all of us are, I'm leaving the masters out, is we are conscious and we are aware of what is unfolding in front of us.
The world is coming in, we're experiencing it. The mind is reacting to the world that's coming in because we stored reactive triggers inside ourselves due to our past experiences. The heart is reacting to the reaction of the mind, or we have stored so much within our heart that it's leaking. It just comes up with stuff all by itself.
It doesn't need the outside world to come in and stimulate. This is reality. This is what's going on. So you are in there [00:15:00] overwhelmed at all times by this experience of releasing energies inside of you that most people know absolutely nothing about, and it's like a drowning person. I'm drowning. Well, while I'm drowning, I'm not very nice.
While I'm drowning, I scream a little bit. While I'm drowning. I yell at people. Help me, help me. I do all kinds of things while I'm drowning. If somebody swims to help me, I'll grab 'em. They may drown too. I'm not in charge of my actions. I'm not a rational human being. I'm not centered. I'm not clear. I'm drowning, and we are drowning inside.
So what do you do when you're drowning? You try to grab something solid. That's what you do. You tried to grab a, a floating board passing by. You tried to grab anything you can in order to not sink. That is how almost everybody is living their lives.
Mark Pearson Freeland: Mike, I'm getting two pieces of information from Michael, a singer in, in that clip, and I [00:16:00] think both of them lean towards this idea of forgiveness, specifically how to forgive ourselves.
Mm. Um, in doing so, what I think he's calling us out to, without necessarily giving us specific definition of surrender. The way that I'm interpreting it though is it is slightly different to surrendering to the situation and giving up. Instead, I think the surrender that singer actually is, is, is calling out here is be aware of the situation that you are in, watch your body's reactions.
Those that body might be both a mental as and or a physical one, and watch it without judgment. And when you can get to a point of watching that reaction, your body's reaction to say a very stressful situation without judgment, you might then notice that you're feeling overwhelmed and therefore forgive yourself.
You might realize, actually it's quite reasonable for me to feel overwhelmed at this situation where I might feel reasonable that it's really, uh, causing me discomfort, whatever this thing at [00:17:00] hand might be. And in doing so, what you're enabling yourself to consider and almost surrendered to is saying, okay, well I'm, I'm, I'm comfortable now.
I can accept that it's gonna be short-term. Perhaps I can accept that it's going to change with time, and therefore I won't necessarily weigh myself down in that situation. Mm-hmm. How, what, what are you interpreting in from, from singer's point with regards to surrender?
Mike Parsons: Uh, so I want to. Focus on the idea of the forgiveness piece.
And I feel like the way I I'm relating to this is, you know, you need to forgive yourself, but you also need to forgive others because you know, when you meet people that have never really forgiven themselves or other people for. Some trespass, right? Mm-hmm. They carry that with them and it blocks their view of the world.
And I've got a little example here. I worked with somebody, super talented person who'd had, um, a really exciting company that they had built, [00:18:00] uh, and it didn't work out for whatever reason. And myself and a couple of people were with this person in a new company after the first one. So let's call this the second company.
And oh my gosh, were we onto something? We were firing on all cylinders and it was a great, but this one person was so hurt from their previous company and because they hadn't really dealt with that emotion. Someone explained to me that they're still fighting the fight from company one, even though they're in company two.
So there was some mistrust and insecurities that had really no, no reason to be there, but they existed because they had not truly forgiven the people who had been unfair to this person in the, in the previous company. And so, [00:19:00] It really hurt the outcome in this new company, which was doing great, like really great.
Mm-hmm. Um, and it just got, You know, all choked up. And, uh, it was the absence of the forgiveness because I don't think until you forgive yourself for all the stupid things that we do, for all the silly things that we say, for all the mistakes we unknowingly make, until you just accept them, forgive them, and move you, you just can't move on, can you?
No. You just can't cuz you're always taken back. I, I think of this as dwelling. In the past, and I think the way to stop dwelling and dwelling feels a little bit captured to me. You know what I mean? You keep going back to like, like I had these, uh, traumatic events, um, like, you know, when I was, uh, when I was at high school, I got, had a really disappointing, uh, experience when I got dropped from a, from a sports team [00:20:00] and it was really hurtful, but you gotta move on.
Like you've gotta accept that you're upset and you were disappointed. You've gotta forgive yourself for not working hard enough. Forgive those that booted you off the team in order to move forward. Cuz if you can't. Do that forgiveness, which requires the acceptance of that there's something that needs to be forgiven.
You, you, I find that you are always taken back to that thing and you are caught up and you almost re keep re-experiencing the trespass, right? Yeah. And if, if you're beating yourself up, mark. About something that you've done and you never forgive yourself, well then you are almost reliving it. It's like inception.
You just keep reliving it.
Mark Pearson Freeland: Well, and and I think if you are, if you are reliving it, what, what's most likely gonna happen is you will relive it. It's possible that you'll then call us, you'll reproduce it. Correct? Exactly. And ultimately, I think this is the thorn perhaps that [00:21:00] Michael Aing is calling out here, isn't it?
The thorn can be something that somebody has done to us. It can be something, uh, uncd by us, or it can be something that we did ourselves and are refusing to move on from. And in doing so, it's possible that you're then gonna recreate it again. Oh, yes. I think you're totally right. Unless you can come, uh, go ahead on and enter the arena, perhaps as Brene Brown would say with this thorn.
And take it out and, and deal with it. You're only ever gonna carry it as unnecessary baggage. So, which is gonna weigh down and possibly influence negatively future
Mike Parsons: situations. So, Mike, check this out. If, if Brene Brown. You know, in her warm turn of voice invites us to step into the arena. How many expletives would, uh, David Goggins require to get us here?
You haven get in the air. Yeah,
Mark Pearson Freeland: exactly. I think it's a similar thing, isn't it? I think he, yes, he's, he's calling us out, uh, [00:22:00] very similarly in his most recent book. The idea of. Not getting too complacent. That's right. You know, I, I think thorns can be in a number of very, very different substantial ways. One can be very, very negative.
Another one can be something much more subtle. So like you just said, Mike, with David Goggins, he might come at things with a lot of energy and what he then notices is when he takes his foot off the gas a little bit and slows down that energy. Ex expelling, we, I guess we could say he then starts to take it a little bit easier, which is not necessarily something that he would normally have
Mike Parsons: gone for.
Yeah. So let's frame this because what we're learning from Michael, a singer and his book, the Untethered Soul. You need to acknowledge that we're all carrying around some thorns, right? And they cause us some discomfort. And once we've acknowledged that they exist, we need to surrender ourselves and get to that cause.
[00:23:00] Not the symptoms, but the cause through this art of forgiveness and surrender. At which point we are now brought to some whole new thinking from Michael Singer. A lot of his work talks about paths and choices, but we can only talk about those if we've done the work on the forgiveness and the surrender and acknowledging that the thorns exist in the first place.
So now what we're gonna do is through Clark Kegley, a great little YouTuber, we're gonna get into. This left hand, right hand turn that we can all make. And the frame for this is all about path one and two. So of course we're gonna start with path one.
Clark Kegley: The way I see it, there's two possible outcomes to this, okay?
There's two possible paths that you could go down after hearing this, and the first one is not good. The second one probably what you want. Let's talk about the default way. This is how most [00:24:00] people live their lives. They say that at any given time, we can step forward into growth or fall back into safety.
So most people, they're living the same scripts, are running the same stories in their mind. They program it into certain ways. The default, it's fear. Okay, this is the safety, the fear. This is where most people are stuck just in survival. You know, it's not their fault. I mean, if you look at biology, 60,000 thoughts a day, it's estimated you have 80%, depending on which uh, studies you're looking at are the same as the day before.
And negative thoughts, automatic negative thoughts or ants. It's got these automatic negative thoughts running the scripts, running the programs in your life. How the heck are you supposed to be positive? Of course, that inner roommate succeeds and beats you up and says all this stuff to you, right? You're no good.
You're this, you're this. If you just let it keep going by default, it's not very good. Layer that on top of one of our cognitive biases that we have, it's called a negativity sway bias. So if presented two things right, a [00:25:00] positive news story or a negative news story, the human mind gradually gravitates towards the negative thing cuz it's more important to see what's gonna kill ya or what has a danger, right?
Primed for survival in our head. Then what could make you happy and put a smile on your face? That's just how we're wired. I mean, I look without getting too deep here, if it bleeds, it leads. That's how the media's running everything, right? That's how they like get the viewership. They get the negativity there, even on YouTube.
Videos talking about negativity stuff, right? Those get insane amounts of views because that's kinda like the modern day tabloids. It's like people stopped following celebrities and they started following social media influencers, right? So of course, who wouldn't want the dirty gossip on some of them, right?
Those get so many more views than like the positive stuff, and this goes to a larger conversation of the global consciousness of our planet. And maybe how it hasn't risen on the vibrational chart towards beyond fear or beyond, [00:26:00] um, you know, those lower vibrational states. So that's naturally what we are inclined to, right?
But as we start lifting it up together, and it starts with you, and I think that you watching this right now are proving that you're not in that camp. You're a higher vibration than the majority, right? Then it starts to lift everyone else up. How do you do this? How do you tap into this second way? Okay?
And to summarize, right, this voice in your head that's negative. It'll constantly go to the default first mode, which is living out of fear. That's the entire state of our global consciousness right now. Look at 2020, right? Doom and gloom all over, right? You look beneath the surface, the story was looked a lot different than what they were projecting on, right?
But you can tell a narrative one way and people pick it up and they're like, oh, that's what's happening, right? But under the surface, if you look at the alternative, it's like, oh, is that really happening? You're questioning it, right? Getting trapped in this fierce state, this doom and gloom. This is the default.
This is scary. And this is why that roommate takes over and is such a bastard to
Mike Parsons: you. [00:27:00] Okay,
Mark Pearson Freeland: Mike, we've got quite a lot of ideas within that clip from Clark, Clark Kegley that we, I think we should start to break down. And I think the first one is what Clark's, uh, referring to from Michael, a singer, which is our default way of living, and that is one.
Out of fear.
Mike Parsons: And do you know, why? Do you know genetically, do you know why we do that?
Mark Pearson Freeland: Do you think it's down to the, that fight or flight response that we've spoken about before? Yeah.
Mike Parsons: And go deeper. Why does that
Mark Pearson Freeland: exist? It's, it's desire to survive, isn't it?
Mike Parsons: Exactly. This is the huge Ah-ha. So this is something we've learned a lot from Goggins and other folks, is that when we're in discomfort, it often triggers fight or flight.
Cause the body's like, Hey, I'm sensing this ain't good, so I'm going to like ignite all these warnings. And so for example, I. How many [00:28:00] times do we hear of athletes pushing through barriers that like the F the four minute mile was considered unbreakable? Mm-hmm. And now it happens all the time. People learnt and trained, but part of that process, it's so Joe Rogan getting comfortable with the discomfort.
Like if you are gonna run longer and faster, you can say to yourself, I know I'm gonna feel like quitting at kilometer 15. Hmm, because I'm pushing harder and I'm running longer. So what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna prepare myself for that feeling, but I'm not going to accept it. How many times do we hear from athletes or from entrepreneurs that people have no idea of their potential?
Cuz they, they listen too keenly to the fight or flight to the fear factor, right? Yeah. Can
Mark Pearson Freeland: you, I mean, can you imagine how many individuals that we've studied on the Moonshot Show that have come close to quitting or maybe even been rejected by other individuals? Mm-hmm. Obviously, Oprah is one that we [00:29:00] refer to a lot.
Yeah. Said that they didn't, she didn't have the energy or the character to be on television, but they refused to listen. And they Correct. Decided to push back. And I think, Mike, this might come exactly as you were saying from that, um, energy of Joe Rogan, the uh, perhaps the courage scene from somebody like David Goggins.
And it really is down to that growth mindset,
Mike Parsons: isn't it? It really is like you gotta do the work. Like to use a sports analogy, like you can't just go out and run a marathon unprepared, but. I mean, so, so let me do it this way. You can't just go and run a marathon without any training. You've gotta put in the work, you've gotta build up the muscle strength, the cardio.
You gotta learn how to fuel yourself. But at some point in like, what did they say, the differences between the world champs and the rest in pro sports mindset, because they will not give up Kobe Jordan, [00:30:00] they just refused. To give up. They were able to go through thresholds, like Gogan says, like, look, you know, most people now don't even get to half of their potential, right?
They don't even push themselves. If you push yourself mentally and emotionally, just like you would physically to go and deal with the thorn, surrender yourself. But also, I think this is the big one when you, let's go. Super practical, uh, negative self-talk. You can just say, today, I refuse to allow any negative monkey mind business.
I'm not gonna have it. You might even say, as soon as I go to start thinking something negative, I'm gonna immediately turn it to a positive. Right. If you get to this point through the work of Michael Singer and many of the other people that we've studied in moonshots, where you realize, oh, I don't have to [00:31:00] indulge negativity, fear, and the monkey mind.
In fact, it is my choice as a man thinker. Very famous book by James Allen. Uh, think and Grow Rich. Mm. If you think about all the great self transformation works, they come down to the choice at this crossroads that Michael Singer is presenting to us. Do we go to the path of fear and avoid? Or do we go through those obstacles?
Mm-hmm. Do we embrace and do we enjoy, like maybe we don't get it right the first, second, or the 10th or the thousandth time, maybe like Thomas Edison, it took us, 10,000 goes at the light bulb, but holy smoke, mark, where would we be without the light bulb? And it
Mark Pearson Freeland: reminds me again, of, uh, Daniel Pink, the power of regret.
You know, I think there's a lot of, uh, studies that he did and [00:32:00] when we dove into that book that people don't necessarily regret the things that they did try. It's the things that they didn't Exactly. I think this again, speaks to this side, this concept of taking an old cliche, taking the bull by the horns or specifically.
Trying to think better and refusing that monkey mind to make the choice for us. Instead, if we can take that back and choose that, uh, first path and avoid, uh, oh, sorry, ch, avoid the first path and this root of fear, and instead start to lean towards this second path that we're gonna hear from Clark Caley.
In the next clip breakdown is how we can continue keeping. That roommate, which we heard from Michael Leisinger on our side, and I said, think about version 2.0.
Mike Parsons: Yeah. So the way we do that before we go there, and I'm dying to press play on the clip mark, but I think like the greatest gift we can give to all our members and listeners right now is when [00:33:00] they have that next negative thought.
If they know they don't have to have that thought. They can choose to make that a positive thought. Mm-hmm. If they wanna get really upset about something somebody else did, that is a choice. They don't have to get upset. They could defer judgment, become objective, maybe detach a little bit. Just accept, yeah, this is frustrating, but hey I'm, if I give into that fear, I'm gonna waste a whole lot of my energy getting upset and it's gonna get me absolutely nowhere.
And we also know people make terrible decisions when they're all upset anyway, so frankly, it's a step backwards. Yeah. You just, if you know that, that that moment is a choice, so if you want to feel like a victim in the world, it's against you and it's this and them and it's so very bad. And everybody that's a choice and so is being great, like [00:34:00] Oprah.
So has been great. Like Walt Disney, Einstein, Steve Jobs, all of these people faced massive challenge in their life and did not let it get the better of them. It's a choice. Mm-hmm. This is the greatest moment of self transformation. If you say, ah, I suck, the world sucks. That's a choice to think that way.
And what we're clearly seeing is that there's another path. And Michael, a singer calls it Path two. So
Clark Kegley: what's the solution? The second solution is right here. This is what we'll talk about is remember, and step forward into growth. While back into safety. This is stepping forward into growth. You can come out of fear or you can come out of love.
This is how you raise yourself up and in turn, raise the whole consciousness of the planet up. Get that roommate on your side. Get everything you want. This is the authentic you, what I call a 2.0 version of yourself when you start [00:35:00] living from here. Now, a quick story on this. Let's look at the author of this book, right?
Who talks about this like being authentic is the highest thing to raise your vibe cuz you're true to yourself, right? And sometimes that roommate's kicking on for a reason. It's like, Hey buddy, this isn't you, this isn't you. Not your vibe, not your thing, right? Change it up a bit. And that's a good way that it kind of is like a coach coaching you there.
Speaking of authentic, let's look at this. Michael Singer guy wrote the book. He'd expect this guy to be like some monk, uh, sitting in the Himalayas wearing robes. Super spiritual dude in Whole Foods every day, right? But I love his story because it's not that at all. He was super successful studying a doctorate in economics.
I think it had, he had a breakup or something that led him to meditate in the woods. Right. Um, and kind of come to some of these realizations, but he started WebMD. Okay. The company that if you've ever and the middle of the night gotten a headache. You're like, what is this? You went to Google and you Googled your symptoms and then you found [00:36:00] out you had, you were pregnant while you were a man and you had like 50 other things, right?
And you're just freaking inside. You got him to think. My point there is that so many times in the spiritual community, I think, or self-development community, we can get caught up on a certain way of being that, oh, that's the most spiritual path, and so we actually abandon our, abandon our own wants, needs, feelings, desires.
But that's actually wrong, quote unquote, to try and conform to what we think is spiritual out here. It's more authentic to be the best version of you to tap into who you really are, right? That's why I love that story right there and that example. You know what you're watching right now. There's some people out there who leave comments all the time, like, oh, this guy is, you know, He's a bro and he's explaining these deep spiritual topics like a chakra who's actually pronounced Shakra.
And you know, if you, you should respect it. And I'm just like to each, sir, right? You meet me on the street, I'm just like this, you know, you can be spiritual and still suck down [00:37:00] a 20 wing combo at Buffalo Wild Wings, let me tell you. And you're more happy when you're in tune with that and you're authentic with it.
This is what I call a 2.0 version of you. I literally walk people through, I've been obsessed with this process cuz I think it's your identity layer, the deepest one. Beyond just the thoughts, the feelings, the emotions, the stories is your identity at the core layer of the onion. The deeper you go, the more effective it is, right?
And then the other ones kind of knock over. Why don't you get that identity piece right? And you create the 2.0 version of yourself.
Mark Pearson Freeland: Mike, this idea of authenticity, it's, it's been such a considerate one that I keep on finding we run into on this moonshot's journey, isn't it? This ver, in fact, as Clark Headley calls out in that clip, the task of becoming the best version of ourself is only accessible through authenticity.
You can't be the best version of somebody
Mike Parsons: else. Right. Well think how hard it is trying to pretend to be someone else that you're not. Like, that's, [00:38:00] man, that's hard work. Exactly. You can't keep it up for too long.
Mark Pearson Freeland: Well, and, and, and, and this idea really speaks to, I think, the work of Elizabeth Gilbert. And that idea
Mike Parsons: of creativity, it's again, giving, you know, someone else we've gotta give a tip of the hat to is Carol Dweck as well.
I think we've gotta spend some time here. I mean, but continue with Elizabeth and then we'll do Carol.
Mark Pearson Freeland: Well, I, I think there's, there's a huge learning that Elizabeth Gilbert have built from Carol Dweck actually. Mm. This idea of, um, forgiveness, perhaps, if you want to give it that sort of title that Elizabeth Gilbert leans into is this idea that it's okay.
To either A struggle, but also B. Take a little bit of time to find that, that direction of yours, because even though somebody else may have got to a destination quicker than you, it's. Inauthentically not your journey. Instead, the journey that you are going on, no matter how long it takes, no matter how much work you've gotta put into it, is authentically yours.
Mm-hmm. And I think this idea of getting through it and [00:39:00] creating whatever that piece of work might be, maybe it's a podcast, maybe it's a bit of design, maybe it's a product or a service, whatever it might be. Or maybe it's just an authentic. Behavior that you put into the world, whatever it might be, that is very, very authentic to yourself only, and I think only that's accessible once you've accept or celebrate that Carol Dweck approach, which is that growth mindset, don't you think?
Mike Parsons: Yeah. We're getting super schooled here by Michael, a singer, I think. Wow. I mean, I, I would say that. If you are open and not closed, if you choose love over fear, if you choose to be yourself and not somebody else, good things happen. I mean, Elizabeth Gilbert said, you know, maybe that story has been told many times, but not by you.
And I think that's a great way to think about creativity and life overall. Um, you know, the, the thing I'm walking away with here [00:40:00] is, It sounds almost so common sense, but I think what people like Kar Toll, um, people like Brene Brown do is they give us reminders, roadmaps, inspiration templates to declutter our brain so we can spend more time on who we really are and get out of the monkey mind.
I think I really do think that's the, the, you know, some of the biggest battle that we all face. I think that that. It's all about celebrating. What happens when we do that? When you clear your head, when you feel good in yourself, that is the the catapult and the launchpad to do good things. Mm-hmm. Like consider the difference.
Let's say you had to write a five pager and you feel tired, busy, stressed. Can you imagine how hard it is to do that? Or if you've had a good sleep? You're in control of things. You've cleared your mind and then you set about doing it. Mm-hmm. [00:41:00] It's gonna come so much easier and I think it goes for all things in life.
If we choose the right path, if we remove the thorns with the process that we've been given by Michael Lassinger, I, I just want to. Make sure we all remind ourselves of what, what is the opportunity and if we don't choose this path, what we are giving up. Like if you can't be your true self, if you can't really acknowledge all the emotional bumps that you have along the way and move towards being a better version of yourself, it feels like such a compromise, doesn't it?
Yeah.
Mark Pearson Freeland: Well, it feels as though you will always be searching for that next. Um, piece of betterment, I suppose. I think one of the things that clearly gets caught out a lot in our shows and in a lot of the books that we study, Mike, is that it is a journey to go on and actually, instead of celebrating the final destination, i e Hey, I've created a great piece of authentic work, or, Hey, I am the best [00:42:00] version of myself.
Instead, it's celebrating that, uh, challenging journey that you go on in order to get there. Right.
Mike Parsons: Absolutely. Like, again, the sporting analogy. Yeah. It's okay to dream about running the marathon, but you should spend much more time dreaming about yourself pushing through the pain at kilometer 20. Yes.
Right. Because cuz that's, that's life. Yeah. Right. Uh, like it's so funny that even when you're at the top of your game, little things can happen to remind you of how fallible we are and being prepared. To push through those periods on the run in life in your work where it's not quite going right, but you've gotta push through.
You've gotta really work on it. It is not sufficient to dream of an amazing life dream of the work you're going to do. That is amazing. That may lead also to an [00:43:00] amazing life, like the reordering here I think is, is really critical. I think in this last clip, what we have is a chance to look at what life looks like when you practice these things, don't you, Matt?
Mark Pearson Freeland: Yeah, that's right. I, I think we've learned already a lot within this show, Mike, we've already delved into the idea of, um, noticing and accepting, but actually this final clip that we're gonna hear from with Michael, a singer breaking down for us is about finding that flow and how to actually flow with, so to speak, those challenging moments in life.
And ultimately learning how to just let it pass.
Michael A Singer: The technique is as follows. Ready? Your mind is a very great thing. It is brilliant. It took metals and sand and taught the sand to think in silicon, and took metals and made a rocket ship. Got inside and flew to the moon. Ah. Oh my God, you are brilliant. You have a brilliant mind.
Okay, [00:44:00] that's not the problem. The problem is what you're doing with it. When you go to that brilliant mind and you say, I'm not okay, cuz I store all this junk inside of me, figure out how everybody else needs to be so I can be okay. That is a total misuse of mind. Stop it. That's what you do. That's, that's your technique.
Stop doing that. Don't use your mind for that. That's the personal mind. Don't, don't use your mind for that. Use your mind for great things. Don't use your mind for sick things. Well, then what do I do about the fact that I'm not okay? Fix it. Don't make everybody else be different so you can be okay. Don't have all these rules of how everything needs to be so you feel better.
Find out why you're not okay. How's that ptu say, work at the root. That's the root, right? Well, why am I not okay? I told you you just weren't listening. You're not okay because you shoved all this stuff inside of you, of every single experience you ever had in your life that bothered you. They weren't comfortable with.
There're gonna be things that are not comfortable. You see a rattlesnake all coiled up rattling. Woohoo. That's not comfortable. I promise you. I seen them all right. [00:45:00] That's it's, that's supposed to scare you. You gotta straight. That's why he's doing it. It's not wrong. It's not bad. He didn't ruin your life.
It's a heck of an experience. In fact, does that mean I should go pick it up? No. You respect the experience you're having and then you let it pass. You're a greater being because you had that experience. Every experience you have makes you a greater being because you have. Had the experience. I don't know how to explain that to you.
Why do you practice tennis? Why? Why do you, when you practice tennis, you just have the ball, you know, ball server that brought up my server. You just have it come exactly where your strength is every single time, so you can get better at where you're strong. No, you hit it all over the place. Why? Because every single angle, you get better because you used those muscles and because you came in tune.
Right or wrong practice makes perfect. Well, if practice makes perfect in sports, why does practice not be perfect in life? Experience is your best teacher. Therefore, every single experience you have, you have it and it passes through. You don't hold on to the rattlesnakes so that you miss the next experiences.
Honor and [00:46:00] respect the experiences you had. Everyone, the divorce, the this, the children, hot child traumas. I don't care. I'm serious. Stop it. You're not a victim. You're someone who received the gift of experience. How's that? The fact that it wasn't comfortable with the rattlesnake wasn't comfortable. Fine.
That's part of the experience. Let it go. I'm glad I had that experience. Now I know better about rattlesnakes. I met one. Okay, I know how to deal with it. Well, okay, fine. You met divorced. Your parents got divorced. Wonderful. You win. The person whose parents didn't get divorced, they lost. They didn't get to have that experience.
That's how you have to look at it. Every single experience you have is its weight in gold. It's a gift from God and it's your gift. Because nobody else had your experience. So you process these, let them go. That's your spiritual path. If meditation helps, meditate, mantra helps do mantra, but the purpose is not meditation or mantra or any other techniques.
The purpose is, are you willing to stop storing [00:47:00] inside of you the things that were difficult when you had the experience? Cuz otherwise you stored difficulty inside of you. It's gonna be there all the time. You understand that? If you have a bad smell, don't. Collect them and take them home. So you put 'em in a room and remember how bad it was and how much you didn't like it.
Just let it pass.
Mike Parsons: Oh boy. Let it pass. I mean, we can go so many ways with this one Mark. Um, I heard practice makes perfect. I mean, that's huge. I really heard someone there who was saying, don't hold on to things. Right. I heard someone inspiring us in Michael, a singer like. Let it pass. Just get comfortable with discomfort and yeah, I'm, I'm like, just don't dwell in the past that, that was so evocative.
That story says like, you don't collect all the bad smells, you smell in life and put 'em in a room.
Mark Pearson Freeland: You, you don't, but I think maybe the. Uh, thing [00:48:00] that you do find with, let's, let's use smells, is that you constantly refer back to them, don't you? Whether let's say it's, it can be something like cut grass.
Mm-hmm. You can then create a memory stack based on that smell. And I think where Michael, a singer is going here is the fact that every single experience, let's say it is that bad smell. Maybe it's something uncomfortable in the short term, but every time you smell it again, you'll be. Uh, getting more and more strong, more and more layered because you can refer back to more and more experiences, perhaps with that moment of, of discomfort or perhaps that thorn that's in your side.
Mike Parsons: So what a journey that we have been on Mark. Um, five big ideas from Michael, a singer. Um, Your fresh backing era in Australia. We're fresh on a new series. That's a perfect moment to give you some homework. What is your peak mark? I
Mark Pearson Freeland: think for me it's, it's this concept that we all have moments [00:49:00] or items within our lives that could perhaps be thorns in our sides.
Maybe those are physical, maybe those are mental, and I love the idea that Michael, a singer is bringing to us within this brand new series, which is Attack It Head on. Deal with it. Don't delay. Don't put it on to, to somebody else's to-do list because it's only you who can go out and access it and try and pull it out.
What about you, Mike? What's standing out to you from this brand new journey?
Mike Parsons: Uh, look, I, I gotta go back to school. It's the surrender and the forgiveness, you know, that's, that seems to be pretty crucial. If you want to pick a path, you just have to, you know, Fully acknowledge, appreciate, and then get the hell on with things like this.
Not dwelling is really huge for me. Well, mark, I wanna say thank you to you as you are back on our Fair Shores here for Show 223 where we studied the work of Michael Lassinger, the [00:50:00] Untethered Soul, and a big thank you to our members and to our listeners. To what a journey we had. We have gone into the thorny bush and discovered that we need to remove our inner thorn and to do so, it really starts with the forgiveness so that we can surrender to all of those thorns and make a choice, because there really is a crossroads path, one of fear and part two of love and a better version of yourself.
Self. And if you do choose that path, that path of a better you, then you really can enjoy all the good things of who you truly and authentically are. You can let it all pass in order to find the best things about yourself. And that really is our mission here, to learn out loud, to do that very thing, to be the very best we can be.
And I wanna say thank you to all of you for being part. Of our growing [00:51:00] community of members and listeners here on the Moonshots podcast. That's a wrap.